45 Things I've Learned in 45 Years

*~~ Today is my birthday and I'm 45 years old. ~~*

I've always enjoyed gaining another year under my belt. Even the supposed hard ones, like turning 30 or 40, were welcomed with open arms. I wore each year proudly, almost like a badge of honor.

This is the first year that it's difficult, but not because of the number 45. Difficult because it's my first time having a birthday without my mother here with me. (Actually, it's my first birthday without either of my parents, my father passed away 20 years ago).

Throughout my life, my mother & I always had a very strong and close connection. She was my mother and my friend and I miss her so much. I always shared my birthday with her because it was "our" day. I was what they considered a high risk pregnancy and she spent a lot of time in the hospital. I would buy flowers for her on my birthday, as a thank you for having me. This year I'll buy them and place them near her urn. I think that'll make me feel better than not buying them at all.

I've learned some valuable lessons so far and I look forward to learning more in the next 45 years. :-)

45 things I've learned in the first 45 years of my life.

1. Time may heal most wounds, but not all.
2. Love is not always the answer
3. Life is what you make it.
4. Real friends come through for you when you need them the most.
5. The public school system in this country sucks and is getting worse every day.
6. Unschooling rocks!
7. Hurt people hurt others.
8. We are all connected
9. Religion does more to seperate people than bring them together.
10. Hard rock is best served LOUD.
11. Biology doesn't make a family.
12. Chocolate does make things better
13. My mother was right when she said "This too shall pass"
14. People may try to hang their baggage on you...don't let them.
15. When people come together, in the wake of a tragedy, it's a beautiful thing to be part of. (RIP to all the souls killed on September 11, 2001)
16. Change is growth
17. Dogs are great friends
18. Don't listen to the attendant - lift those hands up when you're on a roller coaster!
19. Al Sharpton truly is a jackass.
20. There are times in our life when we just have to move on.
21. Always, always listen to your gut instinct.
22. Take responsibility for what you say
23. Take responsibility for your actions.
24. Sometimes revenge feels good
25. It's a good idea to take a deep breathe before saying something you might regret
26. Some people come in to your life for a short time but you remember them forever.
27. Never gossip about someone in a public restroom.
28. Doctors do not always know what their talking about.
29. DCF/CPS/DSS does not always have the best interest of the child at heart.
30. Learning is everywhere
31. Being the white parent of two brown skinned children, I've found racism in places I wouldn't expect.
32. I am a REAL parent. If you ask me where my kids real parents are, I'm going to slap you.
33. My kids are my REAL kids. If you ask me why I don't have kids "of my own", I'm going to slap you again.
34. People who say #32 and #33 are misinformed about adoption and have no idea what they're talking about.
35. I've never been mainstream or traditional
36. I have met some really cool people through the internet.
37. Being gay is not a sin.
38. New York City is the best place on earth
39. My husband will always be a 16 year old at heart
40. Nobody can make you feel inferior without your permission
41. Just because you've always done something a certain way, doesn't mean it's the right way

42. If I don't write it down, I'll forget it.
43. Animals deserve to be treated with respect
44. I feel at home in a book store
45. Life is short - make the most of it


Stephanie said...

Happy Birthday :)

Mrs Dynamite aka Lorena +Wonder Women... said...

Happy Bday :)

Sandy Feet said...

Happy Birthday!! I turn 45 this year, too. Love your list, and am always reminding myself about #13.

To respond to your comment, I would love to submit my unschooling post, but didn't think it fit in with this month's issue. Does that matter?

Joanne said...

Thank you everyone for the birthday wishes. I am so blessed. :-)

Hi Sandy...the question of the month is always optional. As long as the topic of the post is unschooling, it fits right in. :-)

Opal Tribble - Vegan Momma said...

Happy Birthday to you, what a special way to remember your birthday spending it with your mom. My daughter said, "Thanks for having me" on her last birthday. She turned for years old. Judging by your list we have a lot in common. :-)

Joanne said...

Hi Opal (what a pretty name). Thanks for stopping by. I've been enjoying your blog! You're getting me motivated to get back to exercising!! :-)

Tracy said...

Happy, Happy, Happy Day! Great List... #39 LOL... Hubby and I were having a conversation on the way back from the grocery store this evening. He got to giggling over something I said. I asked, "Is grown up Rand back yet?" And he answered, "Nope. You'll have to give 13-year-old Rand just a few more minutes on this one." ;-)

Henry Cate said...

Happy birthday.

Best wishes in the next 45 years.

Lynn said...

Happy Birthday!!

Lynn ~:-D

Anonymous said...

Ummm...where are #41-#45?

Joanne said...

oops...thanks for pointing that out. I guess the mind IS the first to go. LOL

Leah said...

great list!! and happy birthday!

Joanne said...

Thanks so much! :-)

Cami said...

Happy Birthday!! I'm 47 myself and I love seeing women of our age in the blog world. Terrific list, I can appreciate every single thing you've said here!

Rajkath said...

Hi. Happy belated birthday. That's really a long list of lessons. I just want to know why New York City is the best place on earth? Well, just my opinion: I think everywhere is a best place to be if we realize no matter where we are - we are walking on a holy ground.

Colleen said...

Happy birthday!!

Geraldine said...

Wonderful list and happy birthday to you! This is my first birthday (coming up in April) without my beautiful mom too (she passed on last May)I miss her everday but communicate with her in spirit on an almost daily basis.This helps so much.

Great blog, got here via Raw Vegan Momma.

Huggs and many more birthdays to come! Geraldine


Kim said...

Great lessons to have learned. Happy b-day!

Alison said...

Happy Birthday!!

As an adoptive parent also I say AMEN to #32 and 33!!!

Joanne said...

Thank you all for the birthday wishes. You have no idea (or maybe you do), how much I appreciate each and every one....especially this year.

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Khushi said...

Hey Joanne, that was a nice blog... the things that you have learned are so true, if one thinks about it in deep. There are some things which i learned from this blog i will try to apply in my life...

Good Job Joanne..
Take care..
N yeah i know its very very late, your next b'day is on the way, still,
wish you a Belated Happy Birthday.

Have great life, n keep sharing your things so that we can gain from your experience... Bye